LAUGHTER - It's good for the soul!

REMEMBER! A belly laugh a day will keep the doctors away (except those in white coats hehehe)

So I am sure you have figured out by now that I think laughter is VERY important. So occasionally, I will just post something here that will get you laughing!!

This one cracks me up...I doubt it's true but DAMN is it FUNNY!! And the scary part is, I can TOTALLY see my husband doing some of these things LOL

In fact, I made the mistake of reading it to him at one point, and immediately saw the light bulb over his head (hmmm I could do that...oh I could definitely do that..) LOL Needless to say, I don't take him shopping if I don't have to ;-)

For your reading pleasure....The Target Incidents

Enjoy!!

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

 

 After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany

 her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like

 most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to

 get in and get out.

 

 Equally unfortunately, my wife

 is like most women - - she loved to browse.

 

 Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter

 from the local Target.

 

 Dear Mrs. Samsel,

 

 Over the past six months, your husband has been

 

 causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot

 

 tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban

 

 both of you from the store. Our complaints against

 

 Mr.Samsel are listed below and are documented by our

 

 video surveillance cameras.

 

 

 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them

 in people's carts when they weren't looking.

 

 2 . July 2 : Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares

 to go off at 5-minute intervals.

 

 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor

 leading to the women's restroom. (EWWWW LOL)

 

 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in

 an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it

 right away.'

 

 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to

 put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

 

 6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to

 a carpeted area.

 

 7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping

 department and told other shoppers he'd invite them

 in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the

 bedding department.

 

 8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help

 him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you

 people just leave me alone?'

 

 9. September 4: Looked right into the security

 camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his

 nose.

 

 10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting

 department, he asked the clerk where the

 antidepressants were.

 

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously

 while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible'

 theme.

 

 12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced

 his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of

 funnels.

 

 13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when

 people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

(ok now THIS is funny LOL)

 

 14. October 21: When an announcement came over the

 loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and

 screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

 

 And last, but not least.

 

 15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the

 door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey!

 There's no toilet paper in here."

 

 

 

 Regards,

 

 Tom Richards

 

Target Manager

My Soapbox (And YES, it has a ramp) ;-)

The definition for the word handicapped is ~ To cause to be at a disadvantage; impede.

I wonder how many people really think about what it means to be 'handicapped'. I admit, I probably didn't think about it much either before my accident (see first post).

I have been in a wheelchair now for 8 years but the only time I FEEL handicapped is when I am faced with a situation like I faced yesterday.

My daughter is a Peewee cheerleader, which means traveling to other schools for the 'away' games. The high school we went to yesterday was so ill-equipped that I could not enter or exit the stadium on my own. I could not get into the restrooms on my own. I could not reach the stands on my own, in fact I couldn't get INTO the stands AT ALL. I had to sit in my wheelchair, on the track, for the entire game. It was atrocious!
It made ME want to cry, now can you imagine if that had been a CHILD being forced to endure that??

Do you know what makes a physically challenged person FEEL handicapped?? It's not the physical challenge itself.  It's the inability to do the most basic tasks ON YOUR OWN, like going into a restroom. I am almost 40 years old, I don't want to have to ask someone for HELP to get into the bathroom for crying outloud!

I am not asking for SPECIAL treatment. I understand that we live in the country, that a lot of these places are small country towns. But I also understand that this is not some third world country where people aren't aware of the laws and needs of the physically challenged. This is 2010 (closing in on 2011) in the United States of AMERICA, and people need to understand that pouring some cement and shaping it in something that resembles a ramp does NOT make it handicap accessible!

I know there may be some of you out there who think I am overreacting. That I need to put on my big girl panties and deal with it ;-) But I want y'all to sit and think about something.. When I was 31 yrs old, married 10 yrs, 3 kids already, I certainly didn't think I would ever find myself as a Right leg, above the knee amputee, wheelchair bound, for the rest of my life.

You and you and you and even YOU need to realize that this CAN happen to you or your spouse or your kids. Most likely, someone in your life WILL become wheelchair bound or Walker dependent at some point in your life.

I don't want to become the person that everyone hates to see coming ( oh noo its the handicap nazi again), but neither can I just let this pass. What I really want to do is make people AWARE so they can voluntarily fix the problems that need to be fixed before it has to come down to fines.

I guess maybe I should become an Accessibility Consultant ;-) Businesses could hire me to come in and test everything about their business, letting them know exactly what needs correction and how it needs to be corrected :-) Hmmm , I may have to seriously think about this one :-)